Recovery Is Hard Work
Digging deep into our core to learn and understand the real feelings that are happening as we are struggling through something is tough. Tough because we commonly are not able to name our feelings. In my own healing journey, I may be able to describe how I feel, but why then don’t I have single words to name my feelings? Whether or not we can recognize and name a feeling intellectually, the feeling may also be living in our body. One of the feelings I hold in my body (lower back) is shame. This has been an issue for as long as I can remember. Through a therapy called Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), I have become aware that the physical pain in my back is partly due to the shame and I have now been working on releasing that shame. Recently, while working through my stuff in another therapy called Craniosacral Therapy, the therapist asked me what was going on. I shared with her my dream to have a healthy, normal, shame free and pain free lower back. It is through my decision to enter into these therapies that work on my body memory that I have been able to make great progress with the health of my back. It has been an on-going process as there are other factors involved in my healing process. However, I have hope that my back will be free of the shame of abuse and the lies that I believed about myself will be wiped away.
The Hard Work Is Paying Off
I have noticed over the past few months that I have less emotional and physical pain. My hard work is paying off! The main thing I am learning is I will still have triggers from my past. However, I am discovering new healthy coping skills, learning to care for myself by receiving treatment with safe, compassionate people, and I’m growing daily in my faith spiritually.
It is hard work to move forward through the process of recovery from childhood abuse. I have found that the process is ongoing and that in itself can occasionally be frustrating and overwhelming. However, once you have practice navigating through the process of recovery and healing, the storms that come your way will be easier to sail through because you’ll have new skills. So keep reaching out for help, doing the hard work, and becoming more empowered to live a life of freedom. You are loved, you are brave, and you are a treasure and a pearl.